When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong

Yes I did steal that from Dave Chappelle. And no I didn’t ask permission nor am I giving him a damn dime. I know that he thought of it, but he owes me. I spent the better part of my High School years denying how awesome he was cause I didn’t want the “white kids” calling me a typical negro. I already had to resist fried chicken, show up early, and combat all the other stereotypes around them. Watching Chappelle Show would’ve had just tickled their fancies way too much for me to bear. So, Yes! Of course I watched Chappelle Show. I couldn’t miss that. It would be like missing The Boondocks. But if those little Reservoir ass holes asked me, I would deny it to the death. Note: Not for all students of Reservoir High school, just those few who pissed me the f^*$ off. Anyway, on to the post!

As I mentioned pre-rant, I stole this title from the Chappelle Show. But I am not using it in the same way. In fact, by altering its meaning, I am essentially changing the phrase. So technically, it isn’t copyright infringement. #ItsTheLaw

I love, Love, LOVE reading and watching movies. I’m obsessed because these works reveal the writer’s true emotions and intents, whether they want them to or not. The inferences of their plots, the reactions of the characters, the implications of the events, even the choice of settings intrigue me. And obviously, I love over-analyzing these things. Yay! Engineering and thinking WAY too deep into things. Party time!!

In truth, the best imaginative plotlines are those who, instead of using an actual product, invent one based on something in reality. My favorite example is Itchy and Scratchy from the Simpsons. They could have easily used Tom and Jerry. But for some reason, taking the liberty of creating your own animated cat and mouse duo gives the writers and/or artists the freedom to manipulate the drawings as they see fit. And yes, this is why I’m not the biggest fan of Family Guy. I think they just put a twisted spin on stuff that already exist. Not fact, just my opinion.

I know it’s a crazy idea but some imagined things are better than the real things they are based off of. And I have a few of my fave examples below:

The Beets.Featured on Doug and freaking Genius! Really!! It is a total rip off of any and every band coming out of London. And their songs, including Killer Tofu, will totally get stuck in your head. Loved everything from their odd clothes to their crazy songs!

Spiro T Agnew Middle School. That is freaking hilarious! To you all who are obviously not a millennial, this is the school where TJ Detweiler and crew did some amazing things during Recess. I loved the exaggeration of how our education systems sneak these little historical treats in our brain without telling us. Like naming a Middle School after a Vice President, genius and super creative!

Krabby Patty. Is it just me or don’t you want to just try one. I am pretty sure it is just a burger, just as good as a Big Mac or a Wendy’s sandwich. But I am interested nonetheless. On another note, why does Sexy Bob Short Pants want to spend his life working minimum wage at a fast food joint? Is the writer trying to say we as a society need to lower our financial expectations and set goals based on more long-term fulfillments, like blowing bubbles? What are you saying to me!?! Just tell me!

Cynthia. It is true that I hate Barbie dolls, but man did I want a damn Cynthia doll. Her dream house just seemed cooler. Or maybe it’s just because Angelica, from the show The Rugrats, got every freaking doll ever produced, #spoiled. God I was so jealous.

Terrence and Phillip.I mean yeah who didn’t watch Southpark and laugh at these Canadian imbeciles. But the funny thing about this comedic duo is that they are based on the Southpark show itself. So, the writers are actually ragging on their own immature humor and crappy animation via their cartoon within a cartoon. #MindBlown. Now, I am totally gonna blog about blogs that pretend to be deep and reflective, but are actually a combination of over-articulated thoughts, forced epiphanies, and Wikipedia research. . .  Nah. That sounds too much like right.

Anyway, in what other country can you sit around and insult major political figures without it resulting in any negative consequences? Just go to Englandand ask if the old hag is dead yet. Or imagine telling Indians that all Gandhi did was skip a few meals. Or tell Jamaicans that Bob Marley’s music was kinda boring. Or tell some guy from Thailand that Buddha needs to lay off the Chipotle. Whether it is politics, music, religion, whatever people are so easily offended.

So the genius comes in disguising your intentions. Instead of saying, for instance, Christians are a bunch of bible-thumping hypocrites who manipulate the Bible for their own personal gain, you can simply write a book about a religious cult who manipulate their religious manifestations for control of the masses. And hopefully, by drawing so many obvious similarities and parallels, people will realize that you are talking to them about them. . . Or not. In the worst case, they won’t notice it. So, you are essentially insulting them to their face without their acknowledgement. Umm, can you say FUN.

The point is sometimes you need to be fake to be real. And if you still haven’t learned anything from my half-educated ramblings, go watch your twitter feed or something.